More Pope-ular Culture

Since Pope Benedict is the first Pope to retire in centuries, this raises all sorts of questions:
1. Does he get a new job now? Could you see him behind the counter at Starbucks?
2. If he reenters civilian life, does he have to get a secret identity? If so, he can really throw people off his scent if he uses a name like “Mohammad.”
3. Is there a papal residence for retired Popes? That means nobody’s lived there for 600 years. I hope they dust occasionally.
If he chooses to stay at a Holiday Inn, will they leave a chocolate mint on his pillow or a communion wafer? If he stays in a resort, will he be pestered by locals trying to sell him a time share?
4. What do you call him now? “Pope emeritus?” “Post Pope?” “Popeye the Sailor Man?”
5. Can he ever appear in public with the new Pope? Wouldn’t it be cool if they debated? Even better: a WWF cage match! Can the ex-Pope fill in for the new Pope, if the new one is sick? Wouldn’t if be funny if Pope Benedict appeared in place of the new one, unannounced, just to see if anyone notices?
6. Is there a Pope pension fund? If so, has it been raided by the State of Illinois?
7. Does he still get to wear the hat on his birthday?

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